I would like to share here a recent experience I had with the Lord. I sincerely hope this will help a mother or a sister out there.
I’ve been praying for months for the Lord to talk to me and reveal Himself more clearly to me. I wanted the Lord to confirm the plan that he had for me and also that He would visit me and show me something for my life, my family. I needed a boost. After years of prayers, meditation of the Word, chasing after the kids and being a wife, I just felt like I needed to be renewed. so I took a time to fast and pray to seek the face of the Lord, and hear His voice.
As we all know God has His own ways and very often they are pretty far from what we expect. I heard nothing. I didn’t receive any dream, vision, or even a scripture. Nothing! Total dryness.
I was desperate, angry and frustrated to the point where I wouldn’t feel any more joy praying or meditating the Word.
But our God is gracious and full of compassion. He loves is children and does not stay away from whoever seeks Him with all his heart. He taught me a valuable lesson and I pray that this will somehow be for you an answer to some questions that you may have.
The first lesson that I learned was that the problem wasn’t Him, it was me. I received this answer as I came across the post of a French preacher I was listening for the first time. He was preaching on Luke 5. At some point in his exhortation he started to get pretty excited and began to talk about things that seemed totally disconnected from the rest of the sermon; as if he was making a digression. Then he started to talk to a person in particular calling her “sister”. When I heard his words I felt like a punch in my heart.
He was basically saying “Sometimes you don’t take heed to the words of God, you are not paying attention, you are not keeping it. But the bible says in 1 Samuel 3:19 “So Samuel grew, and the Lord was with him and let none of his words fall to the ground”; and you complain saying “God is not visiting me, He is not using me”… I knew with a deep conviction that those words were aimed at me. The Lord was keeping silent because I left His words fall to the ground, because I haven’t kept His promises to pray continually according to them and I haven’t been faithful in doing everything He asked me to. Instead I let doubt reached my heart and impatience distract me from what He commanded me and what I committed myself to do for Him. And one of those things was to maintain this blog. (not enough visits, not enough to share. I convinced myself maybe it was time to pull the plug, without seeking the counsel of the Lord who formally instructed me to create Christian wives. And I repent for that.)
the second lesson that I learned (maybe I should say relearned) was that the Lord deal with His children according to their needs, level of faith, endurance, growth, and call. I understood that one of my frustrations was the desire to live the same experience that other brothers and sisters have lived (how they have experienced wonderful things with the Lord and how they have received great revelation about situation they were dealing with)… The Lord taught me that because of the purpose He had for them He needed to show them those things, to touch them sometimes physically, to work wonders before their very eyes so that they will stand firm in time of tribulations.
My call is just different and so is the way the Lord interacts with me. He had set my feet on solid ground knowing that I will not be moved and had given me rest and covered me with His shadow. I’m just different, not of less importance, not worst. Just particular. And If you are able to conduct your lives in a way that pleases the Lord not because of what you have seen, not because you had a special encounter, a miraculous healing, a spectacular deliverance, or stoning revelation, but just because you love Him for who He is: you too are particular, known by him, called by Him, to serve Him in all discretion surrounded by His love and grace. This is a privilege!
Today the Lord had restored me and made me understand He just want me where I’m. I have completely embraced His vision and this make me even more efficient in laboring for Him. Be encourage you who struggle to understand the will and purpose of God for your life. Keep His word preciously and may He reveal His truth to you the way He did for me. Remain abundantly blessed.