Improper sexuality in the couple

in Women's corner / August 02, 2013

Like many believers I used to think that the Lord doesn’t care about what is going on between husband and wife in the privacy of their bedroom. Nothing is more incorrect than that.

Sex doesn’t come from man but from God who created it as a gift for husband and wife to rejoice and enjoy each other – as mentioned in the Book of Deuteronomy 24:5 “When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken” – and procreate, as stated in Genesis 1:28 : Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

Sex is a good thing, even a wonderful thing; but like every good thing that the Lord has made, Satan has found many ways to corrupt it and make it improper. Among those are unchaste practices and lewd habits that defile the couple sexuality and are abominations to the Lord.

Sex is more than just a physical thing, we can all agree on that. It engages more than just our bodies, it touches our souls too. As an example, it is said in the Genesis 24:67: “Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death”.

Many couples think adding a little bit of fantasia in bed can spice up their marriages and bring more excitement and passion. This is a dangerous game they have fallen into, unaware they have gone astray.

As women, do we associate ‘spicing up’ with wearing beautiful lingerie, spraying light fragrances to infuse the air, using subdued lighting to set the ambiance, and speaking tender words to praise the one we love? Or do we rather think about kinky string bikinis with side feathers, erotic dances on a pole, and nasty words spoken during the intercourse to make our husbands fantasize they are having sex with prostitutes?

Assuredly many men will enjoy this and expect even more, like exploring sexual roleplays, new poses from the Kama Sutra, watching porn before or during sex, reading steamy magazines and literature, trying sex toys, videotaping every intercourse, taking pictures of their partners’s privates parts, etc.

Truth is, this kind of sexual life doesn’t satisfy, but sharpens the appetite for more, and this can become an open door to all kinds of deviations like adding another kinkier player to the game or exploring self satisfaction for those who still have a little bit of the fear of God left in them and don’t want to desecrate the marriage bed.

Let us understand that in everything we do, even in the most intimate part of our lives (and what can be more private than our sexuality?), we should invite God to show us what is acceptable to Him and what is not; and when we feel like something is wrong let us avoid it entirely.

As for me, my string panties are now long gone. I have replaced them with nice, comfortable hiphuggers and boy shorts; and since, my husband is even more attracted to me. No artifice needed, just love and tenderness. In our bed it is not always about sex, but when it is, it’s simple and oh so wonderful!