It is a well known fact: Women like to talk. We talk to complain and praise, when we are upset or happy, and also to gossip.
When I started to write on this topic I realized how important it is for us as christian to tame our tong. I believe that despite all our good intentions and our desire to be blameless in the Lord’s and others sight, our words too often lead us where we don’t want to go. It happens when we compliment someone, just to please or to show our good manners, when inside we pertinently know we don’t mean a single word we said. Who never praised a friend saying something like: “This dress look lovely on you!” when in fact she meant: “it reveals too much!”.
Sometimes our idle words take the form of a promise for something insignificant we won’t even remember to keep. And when we happen to remember we somehow find all kinds of excuses to justify ourselves: “it’s no big deal!”, “she will understand!”, “something came up I couldn’t predict!”. What we seem to ignore though is that a promise, even for things as little as a thirty minute ride to the park to entice a picky eater toddler to eat up his veggies, or something like: “I’ll call you back mom!” (just to elude her intrusive questions), or: “I’ll get you one of those!” to get a envious sister to stop staring at our new necklace, is a promise before the Lord and engages our responsibility.
We have used certain words so much they don’t sound wrong anymore. We so easily say “stupid” or “idiot” that we forget that the Lord Jesus Himself warned us against it. In Matthew 5:22 He said: “But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Raca!’ shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, ‘You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire”
Our daily conversations are filled with words like “shit!” we let out unapologetic for the coffee we spilled over our white blouse, or “what the hell!”, or again “oh my God!” (“oh my gosh” for those a little more concerned about using the name of God in vain).
On the list of things we wrongly say, one that always appalls me is to attribute God words he has never spoken. This is done a lot in evangelistic movies, which most of the time are pure fictions, embellished or dramatized stories to captivate viewers. It is also a common practice in movie adaptations of bible stories: dialogues, events, and sometimes characters are created to make the story more delectable. Well, I believe situating the context of a biblical verse in history is primordial to its understanding, but introducing other things (like characters or events) that weren’t mentioned in the original Scriptures is nothing but a lie.
The Bible is not a novel and need no addition or embellishment. One may think ‘Yes, in a case like this, the Lord could have said something like that’, but did He?
It is a dangerous thing to speak in the name of the Almighty if we have not been mandated by Him to do so. Every word that comes out of our mouth is weighted and we will give an account for every single one of them. So let’s be careful.
The Bible teaches us in the Book of Psalms 10:19 :”In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise”.
I humbly believe that a Christian woman has to learned to master her tong. This also means that on any given situation she doesn’t judge or give her opinion before being aware of all the facts, and having inquire of the Lord first, otherwise her judgement can be biased and harmful (both to her and those who listen).
She should not be prompt to teach, being aware that those who teach will be judged more severely according to James 3:1-2: “My brethren, let not many of you become teachers, knowing that we shall receive a stricter judgment. For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body”.
So to all of us who hope in the Lord, my exhortation today would be: let’s diligently watch over our tong.